Penny vs. Helen

[cyberbard]

No, I'm not talking about mud wrestling... though that would be fun to watch.

I'm wondering what would happen if Penny and Helen were somehow put into a room, and forced to interact. What kind of exchange would result? Helen's hatred of Penny apparently runs very deep, despite having little basis. Penny seems to have forgotten about Helen, or at least she did until the bogus video episode. After the video, I'm sure Penny has some vitriol to share as well.

So in the mental exercise department, suppose the two girls were together in a room, and let's have Penny start off...

P: "Rumor has it that you hate me with a passion that would make Karen blanch. Why?"

[RD]

I'm wondering what would happen if Penny and Helen were somehow put into a room, and forced to interact. What kind of exchange would result? Helen's hatred of Penny apparently runs very deep, despite having little basis. Penny seems to have forgotten about Helen, or at least she did until the bogus video episode. After the video, I'm sure Penny has some vitriol to share as well.

Is there any evidence Penny knows about Helen's involvement? Things got kind of busy right after that, and I cant remember any scene where anyone tells her... I might be forgetting something

Either way- I imagine it'd go about like the "BECAUSE HE'S BLACK" thing. Penny remaining calm and aloof, although a bit disturbed and confused, and Helen hurling insults and accusations. Unless they have a good mediator, I don't see anything good coming from it, sadly. :/

It's not like anything good could come from it. At worst it will solidify Helen's feelings about Penny. At best, it might make Helen feel even more hopeless- she was blaming PEnny for all the bad when it was really her fault, so she effectively ruined her own life and might not know how to come back from that. If she can come back from it that' dbe good, but if not...

[Michael Ezra]

Okay, I'll bite, while I've got a very slow network search running at the office...

P: "Rumor has it that you hate me with a passion that would make Karen blanch. Why?"

H: "Oh, like you don't know why. You said you were my friend once, and then you blew me off."

P: "Uh, what? I never 'blew you off.' We just drifted apart. Sometimes people do that. Doesn't mean it's anything personal."

H: "Yeah, that's what Sara said. Only I know that's bullshit, and I know you know it too."

P: "Oh do you. You can read me like a book, is that right? Point out whatever it was specifically I said or did that 'blew you off' and I'll believe you."

H: "You said I was 'so last month!'"

P: "What. When was that?"

H: "Okay, you said Justin Timberlake was so last month. Still, from the way you turned away, Sara and Michelle following after you like pup--"

P: "Oh, sorry, I didn't realize you were Timberlake's secret identity. Or his girlfriend. Anyway, I'll ask again: When. Was. That?"

H: "Near the end of freshman year. In between classes. You were planning one of your must-be-there parties and were wondering what kind of tunes to play. So I suggested Justin, because--horror of horrors!--I happen to like him, uh, like his music, and you just totally dissed my idea and walked off."

P: "Oh wait, wasn't that when Aggie started up with all her--anyway, not important. So you didn't come to that party, I take it?"

H: "Duh. Or any other of your big debutante dos. I knew when I wasn't wanted."

P: "Did I say you couldn't come?"

H: "Well, not in so many words, but--"

P: "Did I say. To your face. 'Don't come to my parties anymore?'"

H: "...No."


****

Someone else wanna take it from here?

[JerrBear]

Okay, I'll bite, while I've got a very slow network search running at the office...

P: "Rumor has it that you hate me with a passion that would make Karen blanch. Why?"

H: "Oh, like you don't know why. You said you were my friend once, and then you blew me off."

P: "Uh, what? I never 'blew you off.' We just drifted apart. Sometimes people do that. Doesn't mean it's anything personal."

H: "Yeah, that's what Sara said. Only I know that's bullshit, and I know you know it too."

P: "Oh do you. You can read me like a book, is that right? Point out whatever it was specifically I said or did that 'blew you off' and I'll believe you."

H: "You said I was 'so last month!'"

P: "What. When was that?"

H: "Okay, you said Justin Timberlake was so last month. Still, from the way you turned away, Sara and Michelle following after you like pup--"

P: "Oh, sorry, I didn't realize you were Timberlake's secret identity. Or his girlfriend. Anyway, I'll ask again: When. Was. That?"

H: "Near the end of freshman year. In between classes. You were planning one of your must-be-there parties and were wondering what kind of tunes to play. So I suggested Justin, because--horror of horrors!--I happen to like him, uh, like his music, and you just totally dissed my idea and walked off."

P: "Oh wait, wasn't that when Aggie started up with all her--anyway, not important. So you didn't come to that party, I take it?"

H: "Duh. Or any other of your big debutante dos. I knew when I wasn't wanted."

P: "Did I say you couldn't come?"

H: "Well, not in so many words, but--"

P: "Did I say. To your face. 'Don't come to my parties anymore?'"

H: "...No."


****

Someone else wanna take it from here?

P: "I will admit to one thing, Helen... I have always been jealous of you..."

H: "Me!?"

P: "Yes, you! You were always so much more liked by Sara and Michelle, while they secretly reviled me. They even like you more now that you had that sex change operation and renamed yourself Harry all while curing cancer, AIDS, and cloning the dead members of The Beatles so they could reunite."

H: "Oh Penny! I was always so jealous of you!"

P: "Me!? Why?"

H: "You grew out of your boyish butt while I was cursed with mine! Why do you think I had a sex change? You were also activated as a Slayer and slew Karen when she became a vampire. And on top of that, Rich loved you in good, Christian ways that Elmer and Bob would never love me in!"

P: "But Hel--err I mean Harry! Rich cheated on me with a 2 dollar Filipino tranny hooker!"

H: "You can call me Helen, Penny! *Sniffs* I'll always be your Helen, best friend forever!"

P: *Hugs Helen* "And I'll always be your Carmen Sandiego!"

H: "So does this mean I can come to your parties?"

P: "Not a chance in Hell."

[cyberbard]

Heh, ignoring JerrBear's humorous parody post...

P: "Did I say. To your face. 'Don't come to my parties anymore?'"

H: "...No."

P: {confused} "So you hate me for something I never said? How the fark does that work?"

[MeganKoumori]

P: "I will admit to one thing, Helen... I have always been jealous of you..."

H: "Me!?"

P: "Yes, you! You were always so much more liked by Sara and Michelle, while they secretly reviled me. They even like you more now that you had that sex change operation and renamed yourself Harry all while curing cancer, AIDS, and cloning the dead members of The Beatles so they could reunite."

H: "Oh Penny! I was always so jealous of you!"

P: "Me!? Why?"

H: "You grew out of your boyish butt while I was cursed with mine! Why do you think I had a sex change? You were also activated as a Slayer and slew Karen when she became a vampire. And on top of that, Rich loved you in good, Christian ways that Elmer and Bob would never love me in!"

P: "But Hel--err I mean Harry! Rich cheated on me with a 2 dollar Filipino tranny hooker!"

H: "You can call me Helen, Penny! *Sniffs* I'll always be your Helen, best friend forever!"

P: *Hugs Helen* "And I'll always be your Carmen Sandiego!"

H: "So does this mean I can come to your parties?"

P: "Not a chance in Hell."

[Davidj]

="cyberbard"

P: {confused} "So you hate me for something I never said? How the fark does that work?"

H: Um...you do know your parties were by invitation only, right? And I could walk right up to and talk to you, and you wouldn't say anything to me, so it's real easy to hate you for the things you never said.

[sun tzu]

="cyberbard"

P: {confused} "So you hate me for something I never said? How the fark does that work?"

H: Um...you do know your parties were by invitation only, right? And I could walk right up to and talk to you, and you wouldn't say anything to me, so it's real easy to hate you for the things you never said.

P: "No they weren't! Here, let me connect to the fourth-wall hyperlink!"

[Emerald Gloom]

I wonder how Helen never caught on to the open invit-thing...I'm sure Aggie knew but chose not to go to any of the parties. Plus it's hard to host a party and give everyone at least 75% of your total time. You're suppose to socialize with other people and have fun not babysit a person.

I bet Helen's reactions would of been her whining that it's open invite to everyone but her or something like that.
H: I bet you still wouldn't allow me into your royal parties!
P: (Damn, is this girl really that insecure about herself that she thinks she's lower than dirt?)

I'm at wit's end with Helen and her super levels of insecurity. I feel sorry for her but damn it she needs to move on or confront the issue so she can grow into a better person. Kicking yourself to the point that you always need others to tell you that you're worth something isn't healthy. I just feel that she doesn't bother to try to overcome anything and her only solutions is to take it quietly or skip town. No is perfect but it does nothing to keep yourself weak like that.

[Michael Ezra]

P: (Damn, is this girl really that insecure about herself that she thinks she's lower than dirt?)

P: (banging on door) "Aggie, Sara, let us out already. This is going nowhere."

A: "Not until you two have worked things out. We told you, when Helen came back from Boston, the first thing she did, even while still shell-shocked about the pre-interview roleplaying, was look Sara and me up and apologize for being all 'loose lips sink ships' with Karen."

S: "Yeah, and we both said we'd forgive her on one condition: that Helen ask your forgiveness too. When she wouldn't do that, and you wouldn't agree to confront her voluntarily at our next intervention with her--"

A: "That reminds me, Sar: did we come up with a date and time for Brandi's intervention over the Xena issue? Lemme check my 2010 daily intervention planner and--"

S: "Not now, Ag. --So as I was saying, our only recourse was to trick both of you into that room and lock you in. Now get reconcilin'."