OT: Riddles from books older than the internet

[Bo Lindbergh]

Q: How do you know if an elephant's been in your fridge?
A: Check the handle for trunk prints.

[Captain LeBubbles]

Since my favorite animal is the elephant, I am WELL PLEASED by all the elephant jokes. :D

[Lia S]

Q: How many elephants can you fit in a VW Bug?
A: Four. Two in the front, two in the back.

Q: How can you tell if an elephant is in your refrigerator?
A: There's a footprint in the mayo.

Q: How can you tell if two elephants are in your refrigerator?
A: There's two footprints in the mayo.

Q: How can you tell if three elephants are in your refrigerator?
A: The door won't shut.

Q: How can you tell if four elephants are in your refrigerator?
A: There's a VW Bug in your driveway.

[Freemage]

On a dark, rainy night, a man was driving his son home after a fishing trip. They were singing and having a good time when the father suddenly lost control of the car, causing it to skid off the road and into a tree. Fortunately, someone witnessed the accident and called for an ambulance. The boy and his father were rushed to adjacent operating rooms. When it was time for the boy's surgery, though, the surgeon stopped and said, "I cannot operate on this boy. He is my son." How is this possible?

Duh. The surgeon's his mother. This was a lot tougher back in the 70s, when it was first used as a way of getting people to question their assumptions about women's roles.

A woman lies dead in a field, fully dressed and wearing a backpack. There are no tracks to or from the body, and she shows no sign of having been attacked with a weapon, but she died violently. How did she die?

Her parachute failed to open.

[Ameyal]

On a dark, rainy night, a man was driving his son home after a fishing trip. They were singing and having a good time when the father suddenly lost control of the car, causing it to skid off the road and into a tree. Fortunately, someone witnessed the accident and called for an ambulance. The boy and his father were rushed to adjacent operating rooms. When it was time for the boy's surgery, though, the surgeon stopped and said, "I cannot operate on this boy. He is my son." How is this possible?

Duh. The surgeon's his mother. This was a lot tougher back in the 70s, when it was first used as a way of getting people to question their assumptions about women's roles.

I was going to reply that the boy had two daddies.

[Freemage]

On a dark, rainy night, a man was driving his son home after a fishing trip. They were singing and having a good time when the father suddenly lost control of the car, causing it to skid off the road and into a tree. Fortunately, someone witnessed the accident and called for an ambulance. The boy and his father were rushed to adjacent operating rooms. When it was time for the boy's surgery, though, the surgeon stopped and said, "I cannot operate on this boy. He is my son." How is this possible?

Duh. The surgeon's his mother. This was a lot tougher back in the 70s, when it was first used as a way of getting people to question their assumptions about women's roles.

I was going to reply that the boy had two daddies.

Brilliant!!

And I'm gonna spend the rest of the day kicking myself for THAT bit of privilege.

[svenman]

And I'm gonna spend the rest of the day kicking myself for THAT bit of privilege.

Sometimes, nothing is as old hat as yesterday's progress.

[Ameyal]

In the inmortal words of Elliot Dunkel:

Za?

[Freemage]

In the inmortal words of Elliot Dunkel:

Za?

What's the confusion?

[Alice Macher]

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of water. The bartender pulls a gun on him. Why?



The man had a bad case of hiccups, so the bartender reasoned that was why he wanted water. He'd heard that sudden fear cures hiccups too, so he pulled a gun, not intending to fire it, of course.

[svenman]

In the inmortal words of Elliot Dunkel:

Za?

What's the confusion?

Perhaps Ameyal has trouble figuring out how my slightly cryptic remark relates to the situation?

The key to the solution of Freemage's riddle is the idea that women can be surgeons too. Now this would have been pretty forward thinking in, say, the 1960s; today, people may perhaps still fall into the trap of automatically assuming the unnamed surgeon to be male at first (after all, the majority of them still are), but there is certainly nothing surprising about the idea of a female surgeon anymore.

However, this is the 2010s; the riddle itself relies heavily on the unspoken assumption that a boy's parents always have to be a mother and a father, which nowadays cannot be taken for granted anymore either. So this riddle designed to promote "yesterday's progress" (acceptance of the idea that women can perform prestigious jobs with high responsibility too) is itself becoming outdated by "today's progress" (the increasing acceptance of less traditional family models).

...And now, a couple of other riddles:

Why do black sheep eat less than white sheep?
Because there are a lot more white sheep than black sheep.

What is small, red and goes up and down?
A radish in an elevator.

Is it possible to jump higher than the Empire State Building?
Yes, easily, because the Empire State Building can't jump at all.

Where can you find a legless tortoise?
Exactly where it's been put.

What is the difference between a violin and a piano?
A piano burns a lot longer.

What is it: You can sit on it, you can sleep in it, and you can brush your teeth with it?
A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

[Ameyal]

Perhaps Ameyal has trouble figuring out how my slightly cryptic remark relates to the situation?
~snip~

Yeah, that.

I also think that there are much more possible responses than the original one, specially if you want to irritate the person giving the riddle(Kinda like the "How do you measure a building height with a barometer")
a) The mother is the surgeon.
b) The boy has two daddies.
c) The parents of the boy are divorced and remarried.
d) The surgeon is the biological father, the other is adoptive, Or vice versa.
e) The surgeon is speaking figuratively, it's not his literal son, but sees him as one.
f) The father recovered extremely quickly and went on duty mode.

...And now, a couple of other riddles:
What is it: You can sit on it, you can sleep in it, and you can brush your teeth with it?
A chair, a bed, and a toothbrush.

water!

[NobodySpecial]

Apologies for using two riddles from the same place.

Whilst I was engaged in sitting,
I spied the dead carrying the living.
What is it I saw?

[grimmi05]

A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a glass of water. The bartender pulls a gun on him. Why?



The man had a bad case of hiccups, so the bartender reasoned that was why he wanted water. He'd heard that sudden fear cures hiccups too, so he pulled a gun, not intending to fire it, of course.

I think you are supposed to add that the man said thank you and left.

[Captain LeBubbles]

Apologies for using two riddles from the same place.

Whilst I was engaged in sitting,
I spied the dead carrying the living.
What is it I saw?

Mushrooms? An ecosystem built around a fallen and decaying tree?

...zombies?