Captain LeBubbles wrote:Thanks guys. Whatever does end up happening (she says, as though she doesn't already know that she's going to just keep her mouth shut and be happy with what she has, because it's far too easy to make excuses to continue her cowardice at this point), it's good to know I've got people cheering me on.
Adding to that, my boyfriend and I have been dating for over five years now and we started a state and a half apart over a internet forum. I giggle slightly when people tell me "internet/long-distance relationships never work out."
As for my thing, it's not so much a bad day as...well, a dark spot on several days. I am a very friendly person and so I will say "hi" at people when I pass them in the halls, regardless of if I know them or not. I'm just that kind of person, plus I'm of the opinion that it never hurts to be friendly. Except there's this one guy at work who's also very friendly...to the point of weirding me out. I'll be walking somewhere and he'll try to stop me to engage me in conversation, or catch me in the lunch room and try to talk to me for five minutes about something on the news, or just sit down at the table I'm at without asking or making any noise about it and start talking to me like we're best buds. This all makes me uncomfortable because he's never introduced himself to me, I didn't know his name for the longest time, don't work in the same department as him, and keep getting this creepy feeling when he tries to talk to me like we're good friends. I didn't say anything at work for awhile because even though I was uncomfortable, I thought that maybe he was just trying to be friendly like how I am with people (though please keep in mind I don't really do any of that stuff unless I know the person and do talk to them rather regularly.)
Thing is, though, my coworkers in my department have noted how uncomfortable I am when this guy tries to be so friendly. It's gotten to the point now that I'm actually trying to avoid a particular area at my job because I know he works there and now, every time I see him, I start getting panicked and pretend I haven't seen him in the hopes he won't come try to talk to me if he thinks I don't know he's there. What's even worse is there are times he'll be behind me and touch me on the back to get my attention, which freaks me out more than anything. I tend to feel very claustrophobic around people and as a general rule dislike being touched. Someone touching me on the back, particularly when I don't know who it is, is a good way to get my hackles up. The situation got brought up before HR because I had mentioned something about it to a coworker and didn't realize my boss could hear. Having to talk to HR about the situation was how I learned the guy's name; he hadn't even TOLD me who he was! So now, I've had to talk about what's happened several times, feel like a horrible person when the word "harassment" gets tossed around even though I'm the one who's on the receiving end, feel like an even MORE horrible person for not saying anything before now, feel like the WORST PERSON EVER for not ever saying "I'm not cool with this, please stop" to him, and just all around feel bad because my brain keeps running off thinking this might get the guys fired. Note, he has not been fired, just saw him again today though thankfully I don't think he saw me.
All my coworkers, my boss, my boss's boss, and the HR guy tell me that talking about it was the right thing and that appropriate action will be taken. I've also been told I shouldn't feel bad about saying something, even though I still DO feel bad. It's just a crappy situation and I hate it. I really wish I could just get out of it.
Oh, I forgot to mention something. Twice now he's come to my work area with one of his coworkers "just to say hi." No other reason given, just that. The first time I was able to fake being busy with something to avoid answering so they left after a few awkward moments of standing there. The second time, though, he tried to talk to me about my shoes, asking if they were new when they very clearly weren't (....what?) and again they left after a few awkward moments. This wasn't such a problem on second shift, because he works first. However, I like the hours of first shift better, but I almost want to say "put me on second forever" just so I don't have to deal with this anymore. I really don't know how much longer I can put up with this and can only hope that HR will talk to him soon and that'll stop this from happening ever again.
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate's life for me.